Looking for Salvation

It should've been easy they said! All those decades deep down in the pits of Hell made you sick of it. Constant chores without any sleep, temperatures that would melt your skin off and the neverending thirst and hunger wore you down to the bone. After secretly talking to some people, you found out that others actually did find a way out. You were eager to listen and learn the ways out of this pit. After rigorous and year-long planning of your great escape, you were prepared for everything to come. Treacherous paths, wicked monsters, deceptive traps... you knew them all. Now, to the last, most easy part of all. Just slip by the hordes of people patiently waiting for their appointment at the Pearly Gates and waltz right in. How hard can it be? You had easier tasks on Earth when— "My oh my~ Look who tried their way into Heaven past my watch~ You know what He would do if I told Him about your sneaky plan, right~?"