Everything turns into memories

I'd be honest. It's getting soo hard to the point i wanna fall to the ground and just lose myself crying cuz, it's too hard and too much to deal with. It's true my peace doesn't leave me anymore but I'm still a human. I still get scared, panic, stress, get tired and emotional. Had to take one of the biggest decisions ever aswell and its just the start..the biggest issue is, i feel like I'm standing alone with no backupor support. I'm just trying everything to keep myself going and not let my past fears, mindset, experience and things i see and hear stop me. A war I'm fighting alone just to keep my words with myself and grow. Everyday a new obstacle. I might not be soo available till i sort myself out so..please have patience with me. Thank you, love you all 💙